Have you ever met a petite woman with the most beautiful smile in the world? You probablysaw my mother. Vivacious, happy and optimistic, Amma is a small package that brings joy into the life of every person she meets.
As a working woman, Amma balanced her career and family ( not even consciously, she just did it!) so efficiently that I was always in awe of her. Every morning, as she would get ready for work in her perfectly starched cotton saris; I would watch her apply Gala eyeliner and sometimes help her with the pleats of her sari.
I couldn’t wait to grow up to go to work dressed in sarees/duppattas and get to wear eyeliner of course! Little did I know the travails of a working woman or the corporate world!
As a little girl, I could not understand why Amma didn’t come to my school to give me lunch everyday or why she had to take permission or the day off for my Annual Day functions. She would smilingly reply that she had to go to work everyday but always made it a point to cheerand applaud me when I won accolades or performed in Annual Day Celebrations. Both Amma and Appa would always appreciate every little achievement or milestone and that helped build a lot of confidence in me.
I vividly remember looking forward to Saturdays’ coz Amma would be waiting for us at home when we returned from school (She worked half-day on Saturdays). I would proudly proclaim to my friends “Yayy!!! Amma will be home today…” They couldn’t care less coz their mothers were always home and it didn’t seem like a novelty to them. I felt like they took their mother for granted.
In my growing years, Amma was transferred to Bangalore for a couple of years while my brother and I stayed in Madras with Appa. I must add that those were the toughest times for our family and I had a very hard time dealing with the absence of Amma. I would cry uncontrollably when she had to return to Bangalore after visiting us over the weekend. She would be in tears to see her little girl cry; sad and heartbroken that she would have to return to Bangalore, wondering when she could return to her family. Appa would often convince me that I should be a brave girl and make it easier for Amma. Every morning, I would listen to a recording of Amma waking me up lovingly. My parents had thoughtfully recorded the message for me and I would wake up with a smile.
The ordeal ended and Amma returned to Madras by God’s grace. I had reached my teens and was learning to cope with both physical and emotional changes that come with the process of growing up. That year in March, I would be 16! Some time in February, Amma went on a trip to Hyderabad with her best friend for a couple of days. She had planned a surprise for me! On my birthday, she gifted me with 16 dresses for my ‘Sweet 16’!!! A dress for each year of my life; each different from the other and in beautiful dark colors that I always loved. I was thrilled beyond words and my joy knew no bounds at her thoughtful and extravagant gift. What more could a girl ask for? To this day, it has been the best birthday surprise EVER!
Over the years, I had slowly begun to understand and appreciate how Amma had contributed towards shaping me into a confident individual while giving me a strong foundation during my childhood.
Amma and many other working mothers I know, feel guilty about not being there for their children. They often feel that they didn’t do justice towards raising their children. Through this medium, I would like to let Amma know that she is the best mother I could have ever asked for! Amma, you have made me feel very special, loved and cherished through all your little gestures, selfless love and undiluted adulation. I am proud of being a working mother’s daughter!
Edited to add: I wrote this piece for the Chicken Soup Series for the mother's soul... it did'nt make the cut. I wanted to archive my feelings for my amazing Amma and what a wonderful mother she is to me.
