What is MATURITY?

Lots of people tend to assume that with age comes maturity...is it true??
Is it the ability to forgive someone's insensitivity as chilidish behaviour??...then I am not mature!
Is it the habit of going to "lecture mode" on all and sundry??...then I am not mature!
Is it the ability to take everything, both good and bad news in your stride? Nope! I cant do that either!
Is it the ability to forgive easily? Nope! I cant do that either

Personally, I think being mature has nothing to do with age! You could be quite old and still not be mature and vice versa. Its about being sensitive to other's feelings, opinions and ideas. It is about using your discretion on saying the right things at the right place at the right time. Its about empathy and respect for everyone irrespective of their gender, position or any such discrimination. Maturity is to respect every individual as an individual and to understand and respect their individuality - SIMPLE!

How much is too much??

Have you ever known anyone who is contented with everything and everyone in their lives? We always want more...out of everything and everyone. At every stage in life, I have wanted more or something different after achieving what i wanted. When i was a kid, like everyone else, all I wanted was to be all grown up and become an independant woman...and now its vice versa! :-) What to do, I am human! :-P

I have always thought myself to be a contented person, honestly speaking I am not! And most of the times, I want this and that, and that too...lol...like they say "I want to have the cake and eat it too". I cant imagine how some enlightened souls write off material comforts as an illusion that we mere mortals live in. When i look at lovely clothes, beautiful jewellery, a lovely house, some tasteful furniture, lovely curtains...the list goes on and on...I go berseck! I prefer being a mere mortal in that case..lol...

Our mind or the heart, which ever is applicable, is insatiable and always wants more..be it material things or from people in a relationship. S once told me that "To love someone is to love them as they are and as they are NOT". But are we able to do that? We want to change that person into someone we want them to be!

I am no feminist, and I strongly endorse the fact that certain things are meant to be done by men and some by women, due to physiological reasons but nothing else! But i cant simply stand comments like ( mostly from men!) that "Oh! How gossipy and bitchy women are!" Puuhlllleeeez...I know so many men who are extremely bitchy and forever wanting some juicy gossip. How an individual behaves is dependant on how s/he is reared, not on whether a man or woman...

Three cheers to individualism!!!! :-)

Why do you want to know??...and smile... :)

This is my defence mechansim ( thanks to my mom!, that's how she handles people!)devised for nosy people when I dont want to answer their personal (read nosy) questions. I agree that people are different, but sadly some of them do not think twice before they ask something. For example, there was this new girl who joined recently at work, and the first question she asks me is "so...did you have an arranged/love marriage"...I answer that...and her next question is "When do you plan to have kids??!!"...I am like ..."what the hell !!??!!"....even my MIL thinks twice before she asks me that! Lots of people, sadly most of them are Indians, do not know when to stop and end up getting snubbed /ignored/ disliked for being so nosy and interfering. When I had just got married, I had one of satya's distant aunt visiting us. We were just moving in, so we were in the process of putting together all our stuff, arranging the bed and things like that....She gives us a lot of gyan about how we should position our bed, in which direction, so on and so forth...S and I were like....uh...excuse me??!! Infact I should plead GUILTY, coz the minute someone says they had a love marraige...the next question I ask, is "tell me your story!" !! I just cant help myself, I find it extremely romantic and exciting to hear love stories.. :D . But of course, I am sure I know that person well enough to ask that. There is this another aspect that lots of people are interested in knowing, is how much you earn? I have met so many people who come up with various methods to extract the information! We used to have a neighbour who would ask my brother "so how much do you earn pa? is it a 5 figure or 6 figure...just tell me that"...lol Just something 'light' I wanted to share :-)

Music - Quintessential element in my life!

There are no words to describe how important music has become.... am listening to a song by A.R.Rahman, from a surya movie...it starts like "munbe vaa en anbe vaa...." its fantabulous...am listening to it over and over...like a mantra!!! Brings back all pleasant memories to your mind. That man is a genius! Right from my teens, music is like my loyal companion who shares my happiness and my agony aunt when I am sad...or upset! If I have some good music for company, i am quite happy to be by myself...no food, no entertainment or anything...i can just carry on. Music has this ability to soothe frayed nerves...and lift your spirits! Especially when you listen to some slow romantic numbers, it brings a smile on your face! :-)

Gappa Bas....(Shut Up)!!

If you know me personally, you would exactly say 'shut up' to me in whatever language you are familiar with!!! Coz i am someone who talks non-stop....absolutely endless conversations are generally associated with me! ..lol... To keep quiet is to die...in my world! :-)

S has been away on official trips and I am alone at home on weekends...I have so much time with me that i really cant figure out what to do with it! How long can i watch TV or read a book or clean the house?? But I have slowly started enjoying being alone....I dont believe in solitude or any sort of introspection, but i hate to admit that this time alone has done me a lot of good..I feel much calmer and surprisingly positive!

Even if i say so myself, I have evolved as a person..in the sense that I can fairly judge people now, dont voice my opinion on all and sundry unnecessarily and I have begun to accept that life is full of ups and downs and its very important to enjoy both phases with the same intensity and have a sense of balance! Of course....my basic nature cannot change but i can atleast learn to neutralize extreme emotions.

Cheers to me!!!!!!! :-) Narcissist you say??? I care a damn! A friend of mine told me that I appear as such as confident personality that it can be intimidating to a few....so in any case, you think i am arrogant and high-handed...so why make an effort?? :D

My latest glass painting! :-))

In retrospect....Pune!

When we moved to Pune from Bangalore, i was very sceptical initially about how I would like the place. I panicked the first week, when we could'nt find a good place for rent. Its been less than 6 months since we moved here, and now, I LOVE PUNE!!

Its a lovely happy city and I have never been happier...we live in such a lovely big flat here surrounded by friendly people and picturesque views from the balcony. All my friends are surprised when they hear that I am in Pune, a small quiet town...well, it isnt...I dont miss anything here from Bangalore....you have loads of malls, cosmopolitan crowds..am not sure about the nightlife here coz i am not much of a party person anyways...Life is peaceful here. Some interesting observations:

1. NOBODY, I mean NOBODY stares or leers or teases you ( for me its a luxury!)
2. You cannot see anyone fighting or shouting or being rude to anyone on the busy roads
3. Smiling faces everywhere, whether its a grocery store or a vendor on the roads
4. Every festival is celebrated in grandeur and loads of spirit
5. If you know hindi, you can survive without learning marathi ( out of interest, I have learnt a teeny weeny bit!)

Very disturbing!

Last night, I saw a tamil movie titled "Vettai Aadu...Vilayadu!".Well made movie and quite classy like a hollywood movie...except that the story is all about nabbing two psychopath serial killers, who rape and bisect the bodies of women just for the thrill of killing people...Most of the scenes were very disturbing, gruesome details. There were small kids in the age group 8-10 , who had come along with their parents. I was wondering why parents would bring such young impressionable kids to such a gory and violent movie??!!! I cant even dream of exposing my kid( when I have them!) to such perversion and violence.

Its a fact that there are different kinds of extremists who exist in our daily lives....but the mere thought of young girls coming into contact with such perverts is a very scary thought. Was telling S that I am so scared to have a daughter after watching this movie...I want to refrain from watching such movies as it deeply impacts your optimistic frame of mind. ...It reminded me of some bad incidents I have experienced back in chennai, during my adolescent years and I am still very insecure and scared, thanks to such twisted minds. There is no point in encouraging girls to be brave, rather its more important to create such an environment where the young minds feel secure and confident.

I hope and pray that the generations to come,can thrive in a world where love, harmony and genuine people live happily in a secure and safe environment.

The euphoria of being your own boss! ;-)

I have met so many people who always dream of being their own boss, ahem...that includes me!! Its sheer bliss...To a large extent, this stems from the fact that you dont like being told what 2 do( mind you, I am not being arrogant here!)... There are times when you simply have to be polite and listen to utter nonsense, and there are others when he or she is being utterly foolish and his ideas seem to make no sense, and yet you are forced to do it.

I have always dreamed of having my own business, for one and only reason - I AM THE BOSS!! Despite the fact that its a huge responsibility, I would be thrilled to run my own business. Whether it runs on profit, is something to think about ;-) As of now, I have to be content with working for someone else, i guess!!

I have always wanted to have a boss whom I can look up to, learn from and someone who inspires you. My first boss is a fine example of an ideal manager till date. He was a young guy, had this "never-say-die" attitude and would motivate us to do better. We would hero-worship him, and also the fact that I was young and naive.....was very enthusiastic and wanted to improve! The best part of his style is that we would also have good fun, it wasnt just serious work....I think that's the whole funda of a good workplace.

Personally, I always feel that recognition is very important to keep you motivated....I am sure there are loads of poeple out there who agree with me. At the end of the day, your efforts need to be recognized... It keeps you going!!! Unfortunately, certain managers or anybody who handles a team, do not even acknowledge your efforts, forget recognition. People management is as critical and as sensitive as any intimate relationship. I have not managed a big team so far, so i dont really have an idea of how it is on the other side.... I am sure i will know some day!

Right now, just got a huge recognition from my boss for an assignment well done....and yup! It feels great!!! :-)

SINGAPORE....Here I come! ;-)

Satya and I decided even before we got married that we would do a lot of travelling( as we both enjoy it, except that I detest climbing high altitudes and S simply loves the mountains!) and it was finally decided that we would take holidays on our anniversary which is in June and another one in December. This dec, the exotic destination is going to be.....any guesses???.....SINGAPORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am already super excited about it and people who know me well, for sure know how excited I get about even new earrings..so SINGAPORE is big time excitement !!!!! :-)

Life gets more exciting when you have something to look forward to... doesnt it?? I have been asking around people for information on singapore and I have found loads of stuff from different people.

Had a long conversation with amma and appa yesterday. It felt good, i feel much more connected and thankful to them for numerous reasons. I am glad I listened to them about a lot of things in my life, though grudgingly. I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!! You mean the world to me! Amma has become my closest friend, with whom i talk for hours on the phone, post-marraige!

I get this a lot from people...that I am such a spoilt brat! The fact remains that I am not spoilt...am definitely pampered!!! I am not childish, am child-like...at the same time, I have grown mature when it comes to important decisions in life, which is far more essential than any thing else! Spontaneity is something that I totally relate to...Dont you think, there must be some child like qualities in you, that's what helps you to enjoy life to the fullest. I would DIE, if I had to be all prim and proper!!! I like being silly you know!

Now i am all smiles...coz am thinking about SINGAPORE!!! he ..hehe...well, that's me WTD?? WALTO!!!! ..lol..

Mood swings...

All of us go through mood swings....I know quite a few who say "Oh! I am not moody at all"...CRAP! I dont believe anyone can remain upbeat all the time... I dont like to call myself "moody" , so i tend to say i am very emotional and temperamental....as if it means something else! ;-)

S often says that I am controlled by some switch, that if put "ON", I am all cheerful and happy and if put "OFF" I am all cranky, angry and irritated. REALLY!!! One minute, I will be all smiles and cheerful and just the next minute all quite and angry. I have made a resolution to shut up when I get angry, coz generally i tend to say things I dont mean and would regret later, when I am angry....so the solution is - SHUT UP!!

A close friend of mine has been acting wierd of late and i have been trying to figure out what is upsetting her...and i think of all permutations and combinations.. finally, she is back to her normal self..funny! how small things in life can upset someone or cheer us up at the same time.

I know this is absolutely off track from what I have been saying so far ( remember, I am like a switch???) I am listening to some wonderful music now and it soothes my frayed nerves! At work, I sit near the window and I can look outside at clear blue skies and watch the rain during monsoon...I love it! :-) Simple things in life make a huge difference...and I have realized how important it is ...to cherish each day as it is... :-0 Philosophical, eh?

Experience of living alone!

I have always wondered in my pre-wedding days, how it would feel to live alone and stay independant, doing everything on your own...Since I have moved to Pune, and there is no way that my parents/inlaws can stay with me for company, I finally get the opportunity to enjoy the experience as S is away! :-)

Initially, I was scared, but now i am actually enjoying myself...having the entire house to myself, no routine work that i MUST do...so i get back from home, rustle up something from lunch letfovers, read a nice book and just chill...once i get back from work of course!

What i miss is the general chatter I have with S at the end of a workday...like yesterday something happened at work and i was seething with anger, and i really missed my sounding board! of course, later i had to be content with letting out all my anger on the phone....and then when S consoled me, i felt so much better...

Everything in life seems much easier only after you experience it. But inspite of all that i have said, I would love to live alone with S! he he...incorrigible, aint I??

Gardening! My new-found love...

We went on our anniversary to Mahabaleshwar....and everyone you get to see people selling strawberries!!!! :-) Ambitious and greedy that I am, I picked up a strawberry plant from the nursery to plant in my small humble garden(!?).....

A few days later, i couldnt believe my eyes...my efforts gave fruit! Literally!!! There are strawberries in my garden...REAL STRAWBERRIES!! The first thing I do as soon as I get up is to water the plants ...when i saw it, my happiness knew no bounds...dragged S to see it...I was beaming all day... There is another plant that I have, which attracts a lot of sparrows to my balcony, which is right outside my bedroom....so most of the time, we wake up to the sound of chirrupping birds, which is very rare to find nowadays... A lovely way to start the day, isnt it??

Read an article in the paper, about happiness and ways to remain happy and optimistic! There, I have added one more to the list! Nurturing plants is like nurturing children! I feel like they tell me....come and see! How well I have grown! Its theraupatic...

Have started practising pranayama, though I hate to admit it, it has done wonders for me and S...its definitely very beneficial...makes me feel light and good... thanks to amma again! :-)

Yippppeee....Its the weekend! :-)

I am in a very happy mood when its friday! coz, its the weekend after that...well, for one, you can get up late, there is no rush to get to office, worry about what to cook for lunch and most of all, what to wear!! Well, its the whole thrill of having a weekend...it doesnt help not to work at all, coz when you are not working and stay at home...every day seems like a weekend...sometimes dont even remember which day of the week it is...

A friend of mine is getting engaged and when she talks about her guy, it reminds me of my pre-wedding days!! S used to say, to be engaged, is to enjoy the freedom of not being committed yet and still have someone you love!! Its so true...those days were dreamy, and I would always think and relate everything to him...I still do! ;-) I am such a romantic at heart...all my conversations come down to love and S....Its synonymous....

One huge realisation after my wedding is how important amma is to me. Till now, i didnt realize how much she has contributed in bringing me up....she has stood by me at all times....and the sparkle in her eyes and the lilt in her voice is worth all the effort, when i do something that she is proud of...Amma! I love you with all my heart and am blessed to be your daughter....and I still hate your constant nagging! ;-)

Words are my best friend...or are they??

I have just moved to the content team...something I have always wanted to do, instead of the boring routine numbers...the usual financial rigamarole! Content seems to keep me interested as of now, jump from bed to come to work with a lot of enthusiasm...i guess that way i am a typical piscean...like to keep the creative juices flowing!

BTW, finished up a glass painting of a mother and baby panda and even if i say so myself, it looks damn cute! I hope it adorns the walls of a cute little girl, dont think somehow that a little boy will appreciate it as much :-) If anyone is interested, let me know...its up for sale...will try and put a picture on the blog for you all to see..


Inspite of all that happened recently and in the past, I count my blessings and am very happy and optimistic that everything will fall into place....am sure getting there! Life is fun and sometimes unpredictable, its the surprises, sudden turns that retains the element of suspense in life... is that good or bad? I dont know...


Suddenly remembered a few men in my life, who have made me feel so beautiful, and there i am smiling...

New Developments!!!!!!

Its been such a long time, i have ignored my blog for such a long time now.So much has been happening that i have not found time to pen down my thoughts, rather type them!!

I am so happy that finally I got a job, that too something that i have always wanted to do and that too on my own terms, well almost! Life is good, I am happy. Finally, i am learning to relax, ignore unwanted things and people in life, kinda feel mature and contented. S is off to Goa, and this is the first time I have been alone for such a long time. I am pretty ok.

What with my article getting published, my happiness knew no bounds. Its so thrilling to know that people actually read my articles and I even get paid for it!!! :-). Got to go and get some work done now.

Impulsive Me!!

I have this horrible trait, do you know what it is???? Impulsive!!!!!! I always get too worked up about anything and everything. Later, when i think about it, its not so bad, then I relax. I want to consciously remain calm , no matter what happens...

My darling S has a calming effect on me. He is always there, to calm me, relax me, explain to me, he is the epitome of patience. I have always wondered, from when I have known him, as to how he manages to remain so calm and composed. That is another trait which is absolutely non-existent in my dictionary - COMPOSURE!!!!! As years pass by, i hope to be calm and composed in life and shed all my inhibitions.

I promise to take efforts to consciously not be impulsive or make impulsive decisions!!! This is a promise, I make to myself.....looking forward to a better ME!!!! :-)

Change is the only constant in life !!!!

I have always wanted my life to go as I have planned, just like everyone else!!! :-) unfortunately, GOD has other plans for me. Some good, some bad...of late, only bad, which makes me all frustrated, disappointed, sad,angry, not even anger - rage! I am not able to think about anybody or anything else, its so emotionally upsetting.

Then, a close friend of mine, told me that whenever she is sad or upset, she thinks "would she like to trade her troubles for someone else's??" Then, she feels much better and happy to be in her position. Now i am trying that out and true to her word, I feel much better.Why are we so greedy?? We always long for something, and then once that is achieved or given, we want something more......Why is there no contentment?? Why are my needs not satiated?? Why cant I think beyond myself???

"Happiness is a state of mind". True, its all in our minds....How we want to live life, to be happy or not, is something within us..... :-) I keep saying that to myself....Its all within me!!!

Cool Friendship !!!

At some point in life, your friends are your most important aspect of your life. But, unfortunately, i am ashamed to say this, somehow we drift apart due to various reasons like career, spouse, different places etc... But there are still a few good friends who remain the same through thick and thin...one such friend is karthik. I met him when i was working in my erstwhile office.

I met up with him yesterday. He was very sweet and spent the whole day with me along with his family. He has always been very helpful in the truest sense of the word - "friend". I could also different facets of him, as a husband and as a father. I could always remember him as a young man with a boyish charm, ever smiling and full of energy. Always caring , loving and helpful to his friends...So these new roles that he has acquired over time, seemed very new to me. He simply dotes on his daughter and has become very responsible...:-)

Kudos to you karthik, for taking so much trouble to treat me like a queen, I really felt like one for the "royal" treatment !!!! :-) I wish you loads of love, happiness and success in the years to come...

I Wanna Dance!!!

I have this sudden urge to dance, last night i was listening to some good beats on my MP3, and the first thought that goes through my mind is to dance! There is this inexplicable urge to suddenly learn dance and just go on like I care a damn about anything or anybody in this world. I have always wanted to learn dance, from my childhood days. But I always feel shy, what will people think about me?, and other dumb thoughts that i always shy away. Not that i have been to different parties or anything, even when i got a chance, i have'nt danced. I am thinking of going for some nice dancing lessons, will enjoy it and good exercise too...like they say "ore kallula rendu mangai! "...I must shed all my inhibitions and start doing things i enjoy. After all, life is short, enjoy it to the fullest....that's my new motto now! :-)

Dedicated to Love!

Today's post is dedicated to the ever popular emotion, that keeps this world going round and round.....LOVE!!! :-) I am sure all of us at some point, have had a crush, infatuations, fallen in love, fallen out of love.....but it has been an interesting journey! Well, atleast for me, that special look, smile....aah! No wonder there are so many budding poets inspired by love. Everything is definitely beautiful when you are in love!!!! And you must feel love, to understand the meaning of it.

I am a hard core romantic and noone can change that about me. I romanticize everything in my life, which makes it more interesting. I guard my personal experiences and emotions too much to express it in my blog !! So it will remain a secret till I die....

Foul Mood!

I got up with a foul mood and felt really depressed !!! :-( . Had a nice long oil bath and i feel much better now. Ma tends to irritate me to the extremes, with her constant nagging....i guess some people just never change, including incorrigible myself! ;-)

Some small things in life, remind me of how lucky i am in a lot of ways. Its a wonderful feeling to be loved and to love..... i know it sounds like a cliche,but its very true.

Spoke to S for a long time yesterday and was feeling very happy. Cant think of anything much to write.
Got some mundane chores to take care of....look forward to some interesting stuff...until then! by bye!! :-)

My first entry into the E-world!

I have been reading a lot of blogs till date, and today i finally decided to create my own... Dont be mislead by the title of my blog, i am not so pretty....just that these words attract attention!! he he ;-) Well, i am reasonably good looking ( dont you think so too??), but definitely a beautiful person by nature, even if i say so myself ;)

Life is going to start afresh, i will be moving to a new place...oh! the excitement of a new home, new friends and new ambience .....does'nt scare me, just feel like a new me! :-)

Its so difficult to be away from S, wonder how people live separate lives, i guess i am too emotional, but that's the way I am, and i am happy that way too!!! Life is too wonderful to be spent alone!! aha...my own philosophy of life, what say??